Daily Annoyances
1. People who say 'knock knock' when they come to my door, rather than actually knocking, or in addition to knocking.
What do they do that? It's not cute or funny or original. It's annoying. Just knock.

2. People who tell me to smile.
Telling me to smile doesn't make me want to smile any more than I did before you told me to smile. And how do they know I didn't just get finished smiling for like, an hour? I may be tired from smiling, and just taking a break before my next big smile-a-thon. If you want me to smile, don't tell me to smile.

3. People who drive in cars.
Moving automobiles scare me because the people controlling them are idiots. If you can't not be an idiot in your car, don't drive.

4. People telling me I'm too skinny and I need to eat more.
If I were fat, no one would ever say anything to me about my weight or how much I eat. Why is it any different because I am non-fat? You are not the first one to suggest to me I need to eat more, and your suggestion doesn't mean I can actually fit any more food inside of me than I already consume daily. So if you feel the urge to say something or offer food, use the donut in your hand to plug your pie-hole.

C.T.