Friday, April 11, 2003

Drink Cooler Update
My place of employment seriously wigs me out most days. This week has been no exception. If you'll remember my drink cooler debacle, you will understand my quandry for this week.

I wandered down to the drink cooler today to find it stocked, to the top. But, not with drinks haphazardly strewn about in a chaotic fashion, as usual. Instead I found the cans removed from the plastic rings, stacked neatly according to flavor, with a well-balanced selection of each softdrink.

Ladies and gentleman, I was shocked. This is the first time I have ever seen the cooler look this way, without doing it myself. Who is this mystery person that suddenly discovered how to properly arrange a drink cooler? Is this a trick, a ploy, a challenge of some sort? I fear someone is messing with me. The whole thing has made me very uncomfortable.

I thought I would be happy with a tidy, well-stocked cooler at the hands of someone other than myself. But now I am more unsettled than ever, and seriously wigged out. I do not speak of my cooler concerns here at work, because I had come to the conclusion that it was a lost cause. It was easier to handle the chore myself. But someone here has apparently gotten into my head and is now taunting me with the non-in-shambles drink cooler.

Or perhaps the cooler has learned how to neatly stock itself? That is the more likely scenario.

The orderly drink cooler is certainly a sign of the apocolypse. I feel doomed.

C.T.

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