Idol Disappointment
Yes, overall I was disappointed with American Idol last night. Or maybe I'm just weirded out that Quentin Tarrantino was in the audience, cheering like a silly teenage girl. I seriously think he's stalking Ruben.

To recap, the three remaining Idol-ees (Clay, Ruben, and K. Lo) were called upon to fill an hour-long show. How is this possible, you might ask? I will tell you. The producers decided to have each contestant sing the number of songs as related to the number that is their area code. Ruben chose his 205 songs, but at that point Ryan Seacrest pointed out that if Ruben sings 205 songs, there will not be enough time for Clay or K. Lo to sing any songs, nor will he have enough time to make videos of himself using his Nokia cell phone, to show during the show. So, a compromise was reached. Each contestant would sing three songs, and Ryan would shoot and show one cell phone video.

My first disappointment of the night came when I realized there was not to be a celebrity judge for the evening. Clearly they did not get my 108,000 text messages volunteering myself for that job this week. I was ticked that the fourth chair stood empty, while I sat at home watching the show. Paula seemed to attempt to channel Michael Jackson by wearing a poor imitation of the 'Billie Jean' hat. But to no avail. No celebrity judge was present.

Then came the Random Song Choice round. My first question is, who picked the songs to go in that bowl? There seemed to be at least 100 slips of paper in the bowl, which seems ridiculous for only three contestants. Yet, the three of them managed to somehow pick the three worst songs in the Bowl of Random Choices. I hated all of those songs. But I thought K. Lo performed the best in that round. 'Vincent'? What the heck is that song? Is it even really a song? Poor Clay. No way to win on that round. He was sabotaged by The Bowl.

Next, the Judge's Random Song Choice round. I think. I get the last two rounds mixed up, as to which one came first. Nonetheless, the songs the judges picked for the Idol-ees seemed to also be completely random, and I didn't think the songs suited the contestants at all. Simon's biggest complaint about Clay is that he is too Broadway cheesy. So what do they give Clay? 'Mack the bloody Knife'! The cheesiest of all big-band, 'destined to be a Broadway stage performer or lounge singer' songs. I was so cheesed out by that whole performance, I could hardly watch. I hate ' Mack the Knife'. Too many bad experiences of playing it in every jazz band I was ever in, middle school through highschool. Judges, I am so disappointed in you. It's all about the song choice. Bad choices.

The Idol-ee Song Choice Round was a bit better. My favorite song of the night was K. Lo's Natalie Cole song. But, if I hear 'Unchained Melody' one more time, I will seriously throw something at my TV. Something soft, so as not to break it. But still, can't stand that song anymore. Too oversung. I was seriously annoyed by Clay all night. It's unfortunate for him, since two out of three of the songs were not his fault.

To end the evening, I caught a shot of Vanessa Olivarez, the nude PETA posing Idol reject, in the audience. Thankfully, she was not nude while sitting in the audience last night. Although I'm sure someone will do a search for 'vanessa olivarez nude' and end up here today.

My prediction is that K. Lo and Paula's outfit will be in the bottom two tonight. Even though Paula's outfit deserves to be voted off of the planet, K. Lo will go home tonight, although I think she did a great job last night.

I can't believe the season is almost over. What will Ryan Seacrest do in the off-season? I guess he could be a bachelor on Simon's new Cupid show.

C.T.

PS: Sources tell me that the song theme for next week will consist of four songs each: one song written specifially for each of the final two contestants, by Ryan Seacrest. One song written by each of the final two contestants for the other contestant. One song written by the trio of Julia Demato, Carmen, and Satan, for each contestant. And one song written by the audience an hour before the show. Each song will require hand motions.