A Survivor of Joe Millionare's Hot Bachelor Mole
I have to admit I really like reality television shows. Not all of them. But for the most part, they intrigue me. Most of them are just so ridiculous, it's like I can't change the channel. I'm drawn in to the insanity. I have to watch and discuss it with friends. It's addicting.

Like, Joe Millionare. Sorry, but that was one of the dumbest shows ever. I didn't know whether to feel sorry for the girls who were under the impression they were trying to win a millionare, or to be amused as they were picked off one by one. I almost felt they deserved to be tricked because they were such a bunch of whiney, mean, silly, deceptive girls, asking to be put in their place. 'Joe' himself was nothing more than Puddy from Seinfeld, but with curly greasy hair. Not much of a catch, even with the 50 million dollars. That guy never had one interesting thing to say, or even an original facial expression. I wasn't a fan of this show. But, obviously I watched enough of it to know I didn't like it.

I'm a big fan of Survivor. I liked that one from the very first season. I like to travel, and there are a million places all over the world I want to see. I get a glimpse of exotic places by watching Survivor. And this show actually takes some intelligence to play and win. Good backstabbing fun.

I've already written about The Bachelor. I was interested in the show when it aired the second time, more than the first. And more from the 'staring at something horrific but I can't not watch' point of view. I just can't believe anyone can find true love in that kind of situation. But it sure is entertaining to watch people try. Of course, I became more obsessed with the Bachelor after meeting him. But we all know he's in love with me now that he's met me, so I am justified in being obsessed with him. I think my rose must be trapped in all this bad weather, which is what's keeping it from reaching my house.

Hmmmm. What was that about reality?

Anyway, one show that really makes me laugh, although I am morally opposed to the whole idea, is Are You Hot. I've only been able to watch it once, and only part of it. But all I did was laugh through what I watched. These people are serious! Serious about winning the show, like the opinion of Lorenzo Lamas, Rachel Hunter, and some other guy I've never heard of really determines if they are hot or not. And then America gets to vote, on top of that! Not only do they want to win the show, they really think they are hot. Like, seriously serious about their hotness. What they don't realize is that if you have to tell people you're hot, you're not hot. They come out on the stage with their 'hot' attitude, saying how hot they are. But that does not make them any hotter. Hot people don't need to make a big deal about how hot they are on national television.

I mean, I say I'm hot quite often. But it's not to convince anyone. It's just conversation. I don't have to convince anyone of something that is common knowledge and conversationally appropriate.

What I see these days is that there are more 'reality' shows than scripted shows. But I have to wonder how real these shows really are. FOX is coming out with a new show where America gets to pick a bride or groom for someone to marry, and these people have to get married on the spot, sight unseen. Is that reality? Are any of these shows actual reality? I don't think 16 people usually find themselves stranded in an exotic jungle with Jeff Probst for 39 days, but he keeps finding these people in these weird locations. I know it's never happened to me. That's not to say I wouldn't love to try it. But that's not reality for me.

They say The Osbournes is reality, because cameras follow their family around all day everyday, and it isn't scripted. But I wouldn't say that's reality. Maybe it's reality for them. But again, it's not reality for me. It may be interesting to some people, to watch an old rock icon stumble down the street in his pjs, drunk or stoned. And that may actually be his reality. But in all reality, 'reality' television is far from reality.

I don't even think people aspire to be on reality shows because it is 'reality' to them. I think reality television has become more of an ideal for people. They are searching for something that takes them away from their reality, or to change their reality. It's brought being on television within the grasp of the common people, and that's exciting for us. There was a time when you actually had to be an actor or professional of some sort to make it onto a television show. Now, pretty much anyone can get on tv by doing any number of bizarre things. Fear Factor attracts people who are supposedly not afraid to do anything on tv. But is it reality to make people jump from a helicopter onto a pile of cardboard boxes in the middle of a lake? Sure, I do that all that time.

But, this is why I love reality television. It makes television even something I could do. Sure, I'd love to be on tv. It's a few minutes of exposure, the possibility to win money, or a husband (if I were that desperate), and to do something I would never get to do in my normal, real life. I enjoy watching people like me have the opportunity to do stuff in the public eye. It's amusing to me that these people become the topics of conversations. They become newsmakers, sometimes more than actual celebrities. It's fascinating from a sociological perspective. Not that I know tons about sociology, but I do think the obsession with reality television is an interesting trend for both television and the public. After many years of television being an elite group of people entertaining the masses who are typically intrigued by the magic of television, it has now become the elite television people seeking out the masses, in search of less magic and more 'reality'. It seems we're more entertained with ourselves, than with the art that created television in the first place.

So what does this mean for society today? Will the reality insanity ever end? Well, I have no idea. I do know I'm entertained by the 'reality'. And if I keep applying to enough shows, I could one day be a Millionare, or a Mole, or a Survivor, or an Osbourne.

I'd make a great Osbourne. Do they accept auditions?

C.T.