Mighty (and evil) Mouse
The mouse is still with me. Torturing me. I've seen it. In fact, I've been watching it for the past two hours or so. Completely helpless.

And freaking out.

Apparently what I have here is the World's Smartest Mouse. Since when did mice become smarter than humans? I can't answer that. But this one is definitely winning.

And it's pure torture........

I arrived to work this morning hoping the mouse trap set on Friday would contain one dead mouse. Sorry to all of you 'humane rodent removers' out there, but I just want the trap to do it's job and rid my office of said Evil Mouse.

Because he is evil, you know. All mice are.

Well, sadly, there was no mouse in the trap this morning. Which meant the mouse was still at large. In my office. Threatening to strike and devour me at any given moment.

I tried to put this thought out of my mind and go about my business of the day. But, the mouse had other ideas for my time today. He soon began his evil plan.

First, I noticed an unpleasant surprise on my desk. In the corner, but there nonetheless. Mouse droppings. Then I noticed more. And more. On the desk.

Oh he did not.....

Yes, he did.

This called for an immediate sanitization of the entire desk, computer, phone, seating area. I looked all over the building until I found something resembling cleaning products, cleared everything off of my desk, threw many things away, and scrubbed desk, computer, phone, seating area, anything a mouse might have touched or breathed on. Once finished, I carefully rearranged everything back in its place.

Now, I could get some work done. This area was clean.

Well, then the evil critter decided to jump onto my desk. Oh yes, he did. While I was sitting here typing. And while this may seem like an amazing feat of mouse agility, it isn't. He simply climbed the computer cables on the back of the desk, and propelled himself over the back of the desk and onto the flat surface.

Never have I jumped so high in all of my life. White girls can, in fact, jump in the face of a mouse attack.

I then ran around the room for a bit, trying to ward off the evil mouse spirit. I was truly, honest to goodness, freaking out.

I looked for the mouse on my desk, my desk that I had JUST de-moused, but could not find His Evilness. I looked behind the desk. Nothing. He had gone back into hiding.

I had no idea what to do.

I decided to more closely inspect the mouse trap, since what we seemed to have here is a very bold mouse. And, my suspicions were validated when I took a closer look at the trap and noticed the smear of peanut butter had been licked off, yet the trap had not sprung.

World's. Smartest. And Most. Dainty. Mouse. EVER.

So, I called the maintenance guy again and had him reset the trap. This time he chose crunchy peanut butter, which he felt would definitely catch the mouse. He put the trap in the middle of the floor near I had seen the mouse, and he left me alone again. With the mouse.

Eeep.

I decided to clear more clutter from the side of my desk nearest the wall. I was determined to find out where the mouse had made his hideout. But, I did not want to stick my hand in there. So, I fashioned a long poking device made of a ruler and a series of paperclips. With this device, I began pulling things out of the crevice between the desk and the wall, and depositing it all in the trash. Once it was clear, I had a clean view of about an inch-wide space where a mouse could hide quite easily. I saw nothing, but I felt good about my progress.

I then began to think about the placement of the trap, I decided I knew it would be more effective near the wall where I'd noticed a pile of mouse droppings. I went over to the trap and poked it with the poking device to move it towards the wall.

It sprung.

HOW ON EARTH can I spring a trap by barely touching it, but the mouse managed to EAT OFF OF IT and not get trapped???

Not to mention, I had no idea how to set a mouse trap. I'd just seen the maintenance man struggle with it. No good can come from this dilemma.

I didn't want to call the maintenance guy again to tell him I'd sprung the trap. He keeps laughing at my mouse situation.

So, I paced my office for a few minutes, then got up the courage to attempt to set the trap. I bent down over it, looked at it, held the springy thing with one hand, flipped the other thingy with my other hand and..... done. It stayed. It seemed set. I had all my fingers.

I'm a genius!!

I moved it to the wall, just knowing I'd be catching that mouse any second now. No mouse is smarter than me!!

I went back to my chair and sat at the computer. Not ten minutes later, the mouse took another trip across my desk. I jumped up, definitely higher than the last time.

As I was in mid-air, I noticed the mouse not only crawling on the desk, but towards my keyboard. Nay, not towards it. But under it.

Yes, the mouse was now hiding underneath my computer keyboard.

Uh................. now what?

This was a major challenge extended by the mouse. He had not only come onto my desk, but he had invaded my most sacred office object: my computer and keyboard. This is my outlet!! My solace!! My one thing that gets me through the day.

He had desecrated my sacred ground.

Well, the freaking out was in high gear at this point. And I didn't know what to do. Suddenly, the mouse hightailed it out from under the keyboard and went back over the backside of the desk. I walked around the desk in pursuit.

Then I saw him poke his head out from behind something sitting on the floor. Oh my goodness!! There's the mouse!!!

He crept out from behind the floor thing and made his way to the mousetrap. I noted how thoughtful it was of me to move the trap to its present location, because I felt sure I was about to catch the mouse. No way he could escape now!!

I continued to watch as the mouse went over to the trap, stood on the trap, jumped up and down on the trap, ran over the trap, chewed on the trap, ran around the trap, came at it from behind the trap, and eventually ate the crunchy peanut butter while sitting right on the trap.

Nothing happened. The trap didn't budge.

Eventually the mouse got bored with the trap and scurried off behind some other stuff on the floor.

What did I just see????? This mouse is definitely taunting me.

I watched as the mouse went back behind the desk, so I ran back to the front of the desk to see if I could find where he was hiding. I peered down into the space I just cleared and there, behind the desk in the wall crevice, was the mouse. Just hanging out there.

So, now I had a trap with no bait that didn't care to spring anyway, and a mouse feeling good about himself hanging out right behind my desk.

He could leap back up here and eat me alive at any moment.

I decided to scare him out of the wall crevice, so I grabbed a handful of paperclips and began throwing them back there. He ran back and forth, but was ultimately un-phased by my paperclip arsenal.

This mouse must be the mastermind of all mice. He is invincible.

So, for the past hour or so, I've been keeping an eye on him. I figured if I constantly know where he is, I will at least freak out a little less. I've reset the trap with a piece of peanut butter cracker. So far he has eaten the crumbs dropped nearby, loud enough so I can hear him, but he has not ventured back to the trap.

And, I now realize as I've been typing this blog entry, I've lost him.

Oh no............

He could be anywhere!

C.T.