It's a good thing I don't care anymore...
Because due to a VCR-taping-forgetfulness malfunction, I did not, in fact, tape American Idol last night. The Universe dealt a cunning blow by disabling my near perfect record of taping the absurd amount of TV I watch in any given week.

I have therefore missed the final showdown between Diana and Fantasia. I have no doubt it was quite a spectacle to behold. But alas, I can only rely on my power through the Alliance to trust that the outcome will be as it should be.

The Universe almost won the evening completely, as my taping mishap also disabled my taping of WB Superstar USA. But I just happened to be home and decided to watch it despite the taping of it, only noticing halfway through the show that it wasn't taping anyway. I missed the first ten minutes, but I will somehow survive without it. Or watch it later this week when the WB reruns it 108 times.

Sadly, Frank was voted off the show, along with Ross and two others whose names escape me. I really thought Frank, in his high-heels, bare midrift and navel ring, would be the one to go all the way. But fortunately we still have JoJo, who doesn't sing in the third person even though he only speaks about himself in the third person. And Jaime, who reads the lyrics off of her hands as though no one can see her do this. And Omar, who may be able to pull of the Clay Aiken thing yet. And a few other fine contenders.

I would really enjoy a quote list of the judges' comments. I wish I had last night on tape to go back and watch again. They say the best things, but I'm laughing so hard I forget them the next minute when they say something else sarcastically fabulous.

I am more certain than ever that Vitamin C is my long-lost sarcasm twin (aside from my Alliance twin), and that Briggs is the sarcastic man I am destined to be with.

Or at least stalk for a long time.

C.T.