Sunday, February 11, 2007

Welcome to my first ever LIVE Grammy Blogcast

I do loves me some Grammys. And I just happened to have plenty of time to watch and blog about them tonight. So, that works out nicely.

I'll start with the E! red carpet show:

1. Ryan Seacrest is shorter than EVERYONE. Literally. Even Hillary Duff, who seems to be 3 feet tall at best.

Um... that's all I got for the red carpet pre-show.


1. A big shout out to the return of The Police. That was pretty sweet. My big question is.... where have the other two non-Sting Police been all of these years? I don't even know their names. And obviously Sting is, well, Sting. So I picture something like a letter writing campaign from the other to Polices for the past decade or so, which probably included at least one letter a day to Sting, begging him to get The Police back together for a reunion tour. I mean, I just don't imagine a lot of people are downloading Roxanne from iTunes these days (although to be fair, I downloaded it a long time ago). But I wouldn't imagine that my download plus a handful of others over the course of the past decade is really enough to pay the bills for the two non-Sting Polices. I guess Sting finally gave in. Good for them.

2. I'm sorry, Dad. But Justin Timberlake IS hot.

3. I liked the Joan Baez ventriloquism trick. It looked like Joan was talking, but with that microphone right in front of her face so that we couldn't see her mouth moving at all, she was like a life-size ventriloquist's doll. Awesome.

4. 45 minutes into the show, and I think only one award has been given out on stage. But approximately 108 awards have been given in a ceremony earlier today and are now scrolling across the screen.

5. I turned in my video audition late, otherwise I would have been the fourth girl up for the part of Singing With J.T. later in the show. But I'm still holding out that I'll get the call any minute. I won't take me long to change out of my pjs and get on stage. Don't worry.

6. Next time I win a Grammy, I'm totally bringing a deck of cards of people to thank, too. You go, Mary J. I wonder who she is going to thank for the rest of her 27 awards? She thanked them all for the first award.

Um.... DVR weirdness. I have to watch Desperate Housewives for awhile.... Remember, this is a LIVE Blogcast, people. I can't be held responsible for DVR (or wardrobe) malfunctions.

Ok, back to Grammys. I hope I didn't miss anything important.

7. Does Smokey Robinson have kind of a crazy look in his eyes? Just short of psycho, or perhaps just bewildered.

8. I like that for the Lifetime Achievement Awards they just say your name and point a camera at you in your seat. I guess they figure that after all you've achieved, you're either too old to get up on stage and get an award, or it's just too much to ask at that point. Sadly, only one Door was left to be seat-recognized this year.

9. I think Jamie Foxx just realized that Christina Aguilara can sing. He seems surprised.

10. Christina Ricci and Samuel L. Jackson presenting an award makes about as much sense as me and the old guy across the street presenting an award.

11. That was the most bizarre and confusing tribute to James Brown I've ever seen.

12. Ok, what's NOT good about Ludacris, Mary J., and Earth, Wind & Fire all stuck together in one song???? Not a thing. ALL good.

13. Just when I FINALLY got that DAMN (thanks, Grandma) James Blunt song out of my head, the Grammys assume we all need to hear it again. I will NEVER forgive them for this. It's not beautiful. It's true. Doesn't he have any other songs? Anything?

14. Polka in Paradise won Best Polka Album. Sweet.

15. I'm pretty sure Prince just did his own tribute to himself in the form of a television commercial recognizing his own Super Bowl halftime performance. Odd.

16. Damn (thanks again, Grandma). I didn't win My Grammy Moment with J.T. That's ok. Didn't want to get out of my pjs anyway.

17. Wow. I would have guessed that Tony Bennett was not a day under 92. Good for him.

18. That dude that can fly on Heroes is totally married to a Dixie Chick. Awesome.

19. Is Quentin Tarantino wearing a Purple Heart? And which war would that be from exactly?

20. Uh oh. The Dixie Chicks might be mad now about getting played off of the stage. Watch out for their next single, "How Dare You Play Music While We Talk On Stage at The Grammys.... We're Real Mad". Their last angry single seems to be working well for them, so maybe they should do more of those anyway.

21. So when does Al Gore's new cd come out? Anyone know?

22. Um, check that. Anyone know when Scarlett Johansen's cd comes out? That one's serious, y'all. For reals.

23. Who is that creepy hairy guy that keeps wandering up on stage with the Dixie Chicks? He didn't get the dress code memo.

Alright, y'all. THE END.



Craig said...

A few thoughts ...

The creepy hairy guy with the Dixie Chicks was Rick Rubin. He's the producer and was the guy who made Johnny Cash famous again in the 90's. He's kind of a hairy creepy big deal.

And after 10 or 12 times being on stage could the Dixie Chicks not find anything interesting to say?

I'm thinking Smokey went a little heavy on the botox right before the show. Wow.

The Police reunion was indeed awesome.

And you totally could have won the contest to sing with J.T.

Babs said...

gah you are so funny.
totally word on #'s 7,8,9

The Cynical Tyrant said...

craig, you're so resourceful. thanks for the link. i had no idea that if i grew out my facial hair and dressed like a slob, i could be a famous producer and wander on stage with famous people. I'm going to get started on that career

you are so right about me singing with J.T. it should have been me.

planoabear said...

No JT is NOT hot.

Love ya,

Big Daddy

PS - I got a Google account against my best judgement!