Animals Beware
We all know what happened to the squirrel. It was beyond my control. Yet, it happened. Truly unfortunate.

Well, another animal met an unfortunate end last night, at my house, out of my control. Truly unfortunate.

I don't ask for these things to happen. They just do.

I've blogged before (somewhere in my vast archives) about a critter that wreaks havoc on my yard. It's a cat. He roams the neighborhood, but seems to make himself quite at home in my yard. I've caught him snooping around there a few times, but he doesn't wear a collar so I have no idea who claims him amongst my neighbors. He digs holes in my flower beds, poops in my yard, and recently has decided to make my front flower bed his own personal bathroom. It's lovely.

Nothing deters him. The chili powder I dumped in mass quantities on my flowerbed last year only seemed to confirm that he enjoys spicey things. He kept on digging. And pooping.

Last night I invited my parents over for dinner. They live here now. Not 'here', like at my house. But here in town. I decided to be a good daughter and feed them.

During the evening activities, I took my mom on a walking tour of my yard to show her all of my growing sprouting things. I love my yard, and having things that grow (as opposed to things that wilt and die slow, sad deaths) is a big grown-up thing for me. My mom loves plants and such, so I thought this would be a fun activity for us. To wander the yard and look at stuff.

Before my parents arrived at the house last night, I'd taken my own walking tour of the yard, as I always do when I get home now that the sun is still up later in the evening. All was well in the yard. Front and back.

My mom and I completed the tour of the backyard, and happily adjourned to the front yard. All still seemed well.

We then noticed a lot (and by 'a lot', I mean A LOT) of black bird feathers strewn about the yard. Either a bird had decided to shed all of its feathers for a more streamlined and aerodynamic attempt at flight, or it spontaneously combusted directly overhead. Or something had fought with a bird and dispelled feathers about the yard for fun.

Oh no . . . .

We wandered around, not seeing anything other than feathers and my beautiful plants, eventually making our way across the driveway to the other side of where their car was parked. Then we saw it.

There, on the grass beside the car, was what was left of . . . a large black bird.

Now, the cat was nowhere to be found. But we can only conclude that there was a fight between the cat and this bird. And the cat won, 2 to 1. Meaning, two PIECES of a bird and one whole entire cat.

Yes, the cat had apparently decided to mark the arrival of my parents by sacrificing a bird of the air on my front lawn. Thanks, cat.

My mom saw the bird first, soon after which I noticed the head lying not so much still attached to the bird, but cast aside a foot or so away from the main part of the bird. This seriously ruined the tranquil enjoyment of our yard walking tour. I generally try not to have animal sacrifices on display when playing hostess for the evening. This sort of thing ruins my reputation as a good hostess.

Anyway, upon discovery of the head-free bird, I promptly ran inside and made my dad get up from his nap on the couch to come gather the bird pieces for the trash. When forced to do so, I will remove an entire whole squirrel from the inside of my house. But if a dad is handy I will gladly let him deal with bird body parts on the front lawn.

I can only conclude that all animals should stay away from my house. It is dangerous for them.

And I can assure you the next time I see that cat in my yard, he will be sorry he did not stay away from my house.

Danger, evil cat. Danger.

C.T.