Dang Gnat
Why is it that with all of the air space in the free world, gnats have to flit around in the space right in front of my face? I'm sitting here at my desk, repeatedly being buzzed by a wee gnat that insists on getting all up in my face, and yet there is tons of open air in the rest of my office, not involving my personal space. Go away, already! Can't you see the air over there, away from me? You are less likely to get swatted way over there, out of arms reach.

Seriously, gnats have to be one of the more annoying of the bug species, yet they are perfectly harmless. Not innocent, mind you. Just harmless. No one ever dies from a gnat bite, or a swarming gnat attack. Even when walking outside, if you come upon one of those giant swarms of gnats that are always inconveniently right in your path, if you take on the swarm head on, you will suffer nothing more than a head full of gnats.

Well, I guess if enough gnats clogged up all of the air-holes in your head, you could suffocate to death over a really long period of time. But who has time to stand around and wait for that to happen?

Of course, if gnats could annoy someone to death, I guess that would be their lethal personality trait. I mean, what do gnats do, anyway? Do they serve a purpose? Are they useful at all? Not to my knowledge. They just float around, noiseless, annoying the heck out of everyone.

I think the gnat knows I'm writing about him because he just dive-bombed my face. Just now! He won't go away. Dang gnat . . .

The most annoying quality about gnats is that they are hard to swat. You have to have one of those perfect zen moments when you are in tune with the universe and the gravitational pull of the moon to be able to react and land on the gnat at the exact right moment. They are just too quick and unpredictable. They don't have a straight flight pattern, and the air created by the approaching swat more than likely will blow the gnat right out of your way. Then you just look like an idiot swatting at air. No one can see the gnat except you.

Gnats are a serious problem.

Well, this one gnat is for me, anyway.

Dang gnat . . .

C.T.