Wednesday, April 16, 2008

"Hey . . . YOU," she says awkwardly, having no idea who you are.

So, the more people from highschool who Facebook me with a friend request, the more I realize . . . I have no idea who anyone was in highschool. And I have no idea how people know who I am if I can't remember them this many years later.

I mean, it hasn't been THAT many years. But then again, I have no idea what happened two days ago. So, time is pretty much irrelevant for me at this point.

Sure, some of these people I recognize and remember as my highschool friends and acquaintances. I'm not a complete idiot.

Although you people who get married and change your last names, then expect me to know who you are when you Facebook me, even after I click on your page and see only a very tiny picture of you with 10 other people . . . it's just a little ridiculous to expect me to be able to figure you out if I haven't seen you since graduation many years ago.

Anyway, today I got another friend request from a name I didn't recognize. After clicking on the page and seeing a few other people on it that I recognize from highschool, I assumed this guy must be from highschool. But it still wasn't ringing a bell.

So, I went to the highschool year book. This is a place I never like to go. A little piece of me dies inside each time I crack open one of those books.

I found the guy in the book, but he now only looked vaguely familiar. I tried to get in and out of the book as quickly as possible, but the book fell open to the pages where people write messages to you.

And after reading a few of those messages, I have determined that I really was a complete idiot in highschool.

I clearly had quite a few inside jokes with people back in those days. Of course, reading those words and phrases repeated on the pages of my yearbook leaves me confused, and again, certain that I must have been an idiot. Why was any of that funny? And I'm a little baffled that if these people who are Facebooking me are the same people who wrote any of these messages that reference my super-lame jokes, what about any of that makes them think, "Hey, I'll Facebook The Tyrant to see if she remembers that thing about [lame inside joke reference here] from highschool."

Fortunately, I read in the messages of my yearbook that folks in highschool did find me funny, so maybe the ridiculous inside jokes were actually funny. I was also apparently a really good clarinet player (which, of course, makes me proud nowadays), and quite sarcastic. A skill that, thankfully, still dwells within me today.

Of course, I remember very few of the people who wrote these things in my yearbook, so chances are I wrote them myself throughout the years, just to cheer myself up. Using random names from pictures I found in the yearbook of people I thought looked cool and probably wished had actually written in my book, and a variety of ink colors and handwriting samples to give it some variety.

Ok, I didn't really do that. Too much work.

So, People of Highschool, feel free to continue Facebooking me. But I make no promises to remember who you are. However, I assure you that I am WAY funnier now.

I mean, you could be some crazy stalker, for all I know. Including the stalker I actually had in highschool.


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