Change is Bad
I've felt a lot of tension and stress lately. Some of it is stuff I probably won't blog about. But some of it I've come to understand is another Rainman issue for me.

Change is bad, and even when it doesn't directly involve me, it stresses me out.

Two of my friends are moving in the next two weeks. One, just south a few streets from where she is now. Not a big deal at all, but still. She won't be in the same apartment I've known her in for a couple of years. And she is further away from me. Tonight we moved her recliner to our church. For some reason this made me sad. It means things have changed.

The other friend is moving to New York. In a few days she is moving to her parents' house, still here in town, before leaving for New York in August. But nonetheless, she is moving out of where I know her. Where it is familiar.

I don't like this.

I don't like that good things come to an end, that good things have to change. I've missed a lot lately. Not as in missed out. But just that I miss things that were once a part of what I value in my life and in my relationships. And it's just the beginning of things I will miss when moves happen. I search for stability, but that only stays for awhile.

I love that people grow and explore and change and do what they need to do.

I'm just used to things a certain way, and it takes awhile to adjust to the new.

And it makes me sad that what was once close and here when I needed it, won't be.

C.T.